tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41085768118891413192011-09-30T06:43:41.748-07:00Science, Cigarettes, and Cynicism.Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.comBlogger121100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-14508692507447901052011-01-01T21:05:00.000-08:002011-01-01T21:05:37.560-08:00

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Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-913742373529846442010-10-23T14:13:00.000-07:002010-10-23T14:13:51.886-07:00

So, quick post (to get my eye in, sort of thing). Yesterday I was inspired to revamp this blog, something I've been thinking of doing for a while now. Apart from writing about smoking, I'm expanding this to include observations on science, and occasional livid opinions on What's Wrong With Kids Today. I hear you, there, in the back, shouting "But, will you still write about cloves? My happiness

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-30121812458577181242010-10-22T20:34:00.000-07:002010-10-22T20:47:40.605-07:00

I realize I've been neglecting you, my dear moppets, and that you have, like baby birds, been languishing, hopelessly, with beaks open and bellies hungry for clove-flavoured cancer, cheeping piteously for my attention and love. Well, you'll have to keep cheeping. I've broken my blogging fast not, as I'm sure you've been praying, to bring you more pearls of kretek wisdom, but rather to discuss a

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-29065036213400715182009-11-19T18:47:00.001-08:002009-11-19T18:47:22.727-08:00

So, iPhone app so I can write and post wherever I go? Sounds sweet, right? WRONG! because it didn't work the first time I tried it. Let's hope this isn't a repeat of the iClove fiasco. May that story never see the light of day...Look! A pretty cigarette dispenser! Neat!- posted from the future!

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-30412726308913513642009-10-10T20:09:00.000-07:002009-10-10T20:09:10.072-07:00

And so, my darling larvae, we return once more to contemplating the true nature of clove cigarettes, which go also by the kenning of 'kreteks.' What I am to impart to you is both boon and burden. For, if you will allow me to take a quick detour into philosophical fancy, isn't all knowledge a boon, really? And are we not all as sentient beings burdened by our consciences, also, to be ever vigilant

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-66043290650112320712009-09-29T18:40:00.000-07:002009-10-07T15:53:10.795-07:00

Alright, kiddoes, after too long of a break, I've got a little surprise for you all that will make your weeks of agonizingly lonely me-less life bearable again. Not only did I go through another experiment, I also tested the products, and will be reviewing them in this post. "My Goodness, an experiment AND a review, all in one post? You must be magic!" I hear you exclaiming. Yes, my pets, I am,

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-20438434797281301892009-09-10T21:28:00.000-07:002009-09-10T21:28:25.924-07:00

All work and no play makes my blog a very dull read. So it's a good thing that DIY anything is a pleasant mixture of work and play, eh? However, it never does to fall into a routine, for nothing kills the fiery passion of lusty clove-smokin' brigands quite like the same old, same old of real life. So, today, my scurvy curs, you get to take a break, as I give you: Storytime! Once upon a week or

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-65049276182498013522009-09-04T19:10:00.000-07:002009-09-04T19:10:57.261-07:00

I know, I know. I'm a harsh mistress. 'Do This,' I command. 'Try That' and so on. And how do I reward you for obeying my every whim? Neglect! Ridicule! Callousness and Sarcasm! But seriously, my pets, don't protest so. It's unseemly. You've presumed too much, as if I didn't have it all in hand, well controlled. Whatever happened to discipline, eh? Naughty lungs must needs be punished... And, if

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-33921585881927749672009-08-30T19:47:00.000-07:002009-08-30T19:47:41.829-07:00

After my late-mid-afternoon cup of coffee, I decided to be kind to you, dear readers, and not to let you wallow in suspense over my ingenious solutions to the previous clove cigarette failure. The despair you must have felt truly awes me. How you must have refreshed the blog page, frantically, madly hoping against hope that I, your Fragrant Goddess of Smoking Science would once more step down

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-72647713102485071312009-08-29T20:02:00.000-07:002009-08-30T17:38:27.438-07:00

For the past few days, I have faithfully smoked the products of our first attempt at clove cigarettes. I have made myself into a guinea pig for you, fellow clove-lovers. Life and Limb have been placed ceremoniously upon the line, in the pursuit of life, liberty, and the perfection of clove-iness. It is with mixed emotions that I report that while life and limb remain intact, perfection is, as yet

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-13043688901051224962009-08-26T18:05:00.000-07:002009-08-30T17:38:43.619-07:00

Suicidal levels of coffee fueling my productivity, I finally consulted Wikipedia's Kreteks entry. After mentioning the origin of the name 'kretek' and expounding a quick history, Wiki lists the ingredients in these most delicious of nicotine-providers as tobacco, cloves, a 'chef's special sauce' (hurr hurr), and sacharrine, which coats the cigarettes once they've been rolled and provides that

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4108576811889141319.post-8160729071272343892009-08-22T19:27:00.000-07:002009-08-22T19:45:44.458-07:00

Once upon a time, about a decade ago, I started smoking (gasp!). But, you say, weren't you just a wee gel then? And yes, yes I was, I reply. I decided, one day, when I was bored and skipping social studies lecture, that I needed a new activity to burn off the nervous energy all that excess coffee and Surge gave me. (Remember Surge? Pre-Red Bull super caffeinated nuclear green soda pop? Ah, those

Monsterfacehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09989871242005933974noreply@blogger.com0